Carmy is the protogonist of The Bear.

In it's third season, Carmy has an ambition:

to win a Michelin star.

In his journey, Carmy is sliding into a dangerous place.

Can the pursuit of excellence be toxic?

The extents we go depend on how much we care.

When something matters to us a great deal,
we might go so high up that curve
that we cross a breaking threshold
and enter the toxic zone

The toxic zone is where we risk harm to ourselves by pushing too far or staying too long.

We all have limits.

Those limits depend on the activity, on our competence level, and on the circumstances under which we operate.

We all want to push our limits.

The tricky part is that, in order to do it, we must exceed them. We must be willing to try what we're unable to.

In a way, we don't push our limits, but pull from them, from the other side of struggle.

This implies that there's some channel of growth there, in that space above our competence level and below the breaking threshold, where improvement happens naturally and safely.

I think we all have a sense of when we've crossed our threshold of competence and entered the channel of growth.

It's the transition from comfort to discomfort, from easy to challenging.

But knowing when we've slipped from the channel of growth into the toxic zone requires a much deeper level of self-knowledge and awareness.

The problem is, once we've crossed our competence threshold, we are on uncharted territory. Everything feels like a struggle.

A hard struggle might well be what growth looks like. Actually,

The harder the struggle,
the faster the growth,
but also the greater the risk.

If we have slipped into the toxic zone, for the most unaware of us, we might read the signals when it's too late.

Growth is intoxicating.

When we see the signs of development in us, we just want more of the same.

When we care a lot about something, and we're operating on the far right side of the chart, there's no end to our ambition, and our personal limits can be a drag that we don't want to acknowledge, to bear, to accept.

Growth is a fundamental human drive.

I would say more:

Growth is a fundamental life drive.

Everything that's alive wants not only to survive, but to develop and to flourish.

We're no different. We're naturally drawn to chase competence, mastery, excellence.

Actually,

the pursuit of excellence is a more compelling aim that the pursuit of happiness, so abstract and elusive.

As Jungian psychologist James Hollis advices: do not decide on "Will this make me happier", but on
“Will this choice enlarge me or diminish me?”.

So Carmy is doing what he needs to do, aim for that Michelin star, but in order to succeed and truly grow in the process (and not collapse physically and emotionally), he will have to do better than just displaying his cooking prowess, his creativity and his leadership.

He will need to master the only two things that matter to live a fulfilling life:

Will and Presence

The Will to do what is needed,
in the good times and the bad,
in the creation of a new dish,
in the cleaning of the floor,
in the shelling of five thousand peas.

The Presence to know what is needed,
and only what is needed,
when to push and when to hold,
when to consolidate and when to advance.

Carmy has loads of Will and little Presence.

It's a sign of the times

(and, for those watching the show, it's also a sign of the baggage that he carries, and the fact that aiming for the moon in his restaurant will lock his head away from his many other unresolved issues),

but it's a sign of the times, I was saying, to glorify achievement and ignore the path, and how the path was travelled.

So in these weeks of renewed resolutions, don't make the mistake of comitting the Will and omitting the Presence.

Going deep is what you must do,
just don't forget the canary.